As is obvious from my previous post, S and I have been exploring anal play a bit more. This is something I’ve enjoyed with a few previous partners, but only very occasionally. S’ past experiences receiving anal have been pretty dreadful, so we’re moving slowly, carefully, and trying to build a wealth of positive associations for her before getting too ambitious.

There’s a school of thought out there that says if you expect something from your partner, you better be willing to go there yourself. More specifically, if you’re all hot and bothered to have your partner take something up their ass, it’s only fair that you be willing to do the same. “Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it.”

My personal belief is that this is more of a general guideline, rather than a hard-and-fast rule. Trying too hard to maintain a strict symmetry in relationships can backfire. Sometimes a person only likes one end of the equation, not the other, and as long as both partners are consenting and cool with that, no harm, no foul.

But, you know me; I’m in this to learn, to experience new things, to broaden my horizons. I really do want to know more about receiving anal play, so that I can be better, more informed, more considerate about how to give anal pleasure to someone else. Besides, the prostate, right?! Men have this enormous erogenous zone in their ass; how sad would it be to ignore that and the pleasure it might be able to provide?

So, there has been some fooling around with my ass lately. For a while now, I’ve known I like having my perineum stimulated. And if I’m feeling relaxed, confidently clean, and very comfortable with my partner, I enjoy getting rimmed. But I haven’t had a lot of experience being penetrated. I’ve fooled around with an Aneros prostate toy and haven’t gotten much out of it. I have an ex- with extensive medical training, and she attempted to stimulate my prostate a couple of times, with a fair bit of confusion and no fireworks. Bummer. (No pun intended.)

By contrast, S has a fair bit of experience playing with the ass of previous partners, and feels very confident in playing with the prostate. She and I have tried that a couple of times, with some minor success, but nothing earth shaking.

Yesterday, I was in the mood to up the ante. We spent a solid three hours in the “Fuck Treehouse” and tried a variety of toys: hard, soft, vibrating, static, fast, slow, gentle and rough. Without further ado, here are the toys that were up my ass yesterday:

From left to right:
First is a slender silicon butt plug, with a wee little vibrator threaded through the base. I kinda liked that. I don’t think it would have made me cum, and the vibrations were subtle, but if I did a clench and release pattern with my ass cheeks, it felt nice.

Next is a slightly girthier butt plug, with considerably stronger vibrations. Same as with the previous toy; that wasn’t enough to get me off, but I enjoyed the sensations.

Then a glass dildo, thicker still. I felt kind of “meh” about that. Glass has a frictionless glide (when well oiled) that made insertion easy, but otherwise it was uninspiring.

Then a double-ended dildo that S wore in a harness for fucking me. The cliched position for having your ass fucked is doggy style, but I’m taller than S and I couldn’t seem to get low enough for her to reach me in that position. And, of course, the curve of that dildo meant I needed to be face up for it to stimulate my prostate. That was enjoyable, primarily because of the interactivity. Watching S get off from the end of the dildo inside her, egging her on to push harder or deeper, that was fun. In hindsight (again, no pun intended), I’m surprised I handled the girth of that dildo as well as I did. Of course, there had been some extensive warm up prior to that toy.

Lastly, there is the silicon dildo attachment for the Sybian. Finding the right position to ride the Sybian was a challenge. If I really wanted the vibration to focus on my prostate (can I just start calling it the “p-spot”?), I couldn’t be resting on my knees as is traditional for a woman on the Sybian. Instead I got my feet under me and leaned backwards considerably, bracing my arms on a padded bench placed just behind the Sybian. Effective, but it was putting a strain on my arms holding myself up that way. At the end, I had S lying in front of me, sucking my cock while I perched on the Sybian. The sensation was delicious, intense, and overwhelming, but I still didn’t manage to cum. Maybe it was from the strain of holding myself, maybe I didn’t have the stimulation in quite the right spot, maybe I wasn’t psychologically ready to let go. Dunno. I enjoyed it, but no release.

Overall, I had a good time, and when I finally laid back and masturbated afterwards, the force and quantity of my ejaculation was staggering. I’d try any of the toys again, but I suspect I might need to do some shopping for the kind of sharply curved toys specifically intended for prostate stimulation.

Most importantly, the experience gave me some insights into how to improve my technique when I’m playing with someone else’s anus and rectum, and how to do that in a way that feels safe, reassuring, and (hopefully) rewarding.

10. July 2012 · Write a comment · Categories: theory · Tags:

In my initial blog post, I made an off-hand comment about “videos of MRI scans of people having sex”. I couldn’t just let that go without a citation, now could I? Without further ado, here it is: